There's no doubt: a decade after we all thought there would be hopeful change, there is simply more visible hate. Hate has been given license and freedom where it had never before.
Reactions are so visceral there leaves little room for discussion. Facebook tirades turn into statements with "no comments please." No discussion please, they say.
No discussion?
It's offensive to me that a lack of discussion is permissible. It's offensive to me that unbridled hate and statements made without question are given free reign.
But I understand why they are. People are tired of "discussions" gone sour. On Facebook, discussions rarely exist. Now with hate being an okay, socially acceptable disease, they devolve quickly into puff matches. And I don't care who you're voting for, the candidates are all stewing it at this point. It gives them fuel, and it gives them donors.
Dude, I could go on and on and spiral downward with this country.
Hate is bait.
Instead, I'm going to pull myself out of the muck. I'm going to try to take the hate and turn what I see as something destroying political debate - and therefore our country - into something constructive. I'm going to revitalize something called, "asking questions."
I've developed a constructive outline for disagreements on Facebook. I hope this proves useful to you. I hope your friendships are maintained or even enhanced by the outline below. Thomas Jefferson and John Adams frequently disagreed and yet were able to pull some semblance of a lasting document together. We can do it, dudes! We can rise above this chaos.
Here we go:
Step 1: Facebook statement made, or graphic posted
Step 2: Friend/commenter of that person reminds themselves that that person, who has been their FRIEND, truly believes in what they posted.
Step 3: Commenter: instead of disagreeing right off the bat, ask, "What are your reasons for this opinion? I respect you, and I'd like to know where you are coming from."
Step 4: Statement Originator: State reasons without turning a stink eye at your Facebook friend. Keep it, as we used to say in the 90s, professional. Professional means a focus on the issue and facts, not any assumptions you have about your friend, the media, or the world.
Step 5: Commenter: "Interesting."
And then nothing else! I dare you! Just THINK about their reasons! Step away from Facebook. Go about your more important day. This is especially important should your passionate disagreement rise within you like a Montezuma's Revenge symptom, rocket-powered, unstoppable, on its way out... JUST STOP.
And after a few hours, when you have your wits about you, you can return.
Step 6: Commenter: "I've been thinking about what you wrote/posted/drew. I understand your reasons. I respectfully disagree for these reasons."
And then avoid words used commonly now in major news stories to persuade or convey emotion. They are typically adverbs. Yes, so just casually avoid adverbs. Everyone knows you are just as passionate as the next person. Present yourself professionally so that your friend can even hear your ideas.
It's a good thing, this seeking understanding from one another. We can rise above the new healthcare dependency age of 26. Let's be 21 again when we take responsibility for ourselves, shall we? Let's strive to conduct ourselves like adults and not fall for the bait of hate.
Let's use this political climate to reach across aisles. One can disagree with policies, how people represent themselves (certainly!), but it's dangerous to use that as a reason to hate any person - a candidate, or a friend. In fundamentalist worlds, that hate can be manipulated to do anything. Do not give it a berth in your heart. Do not let that start at a friendship's expense.
Don't empty your pockets or your energy into something that is bad for your soul. At least on Facebook political comments, swim in the stream away from the hate bait - flee it before it sucks you in to the bucket of other fish who bit. It's not okay to hate - anyone.
Matthew 5:43“You have heard that it was said, ‘Love your neighbori and hate your enemy.’ 44But I tell you, love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you, 45that you may be children of your Father in heaven. He causes his sun to rise on the evil and the good, and sends rain on the righteous and the unrighteous. 46If you love those who love you, what reward will you get? Are not even the tax collectors doing that? 47And if you greet only your own people, what are you doing more than others? Do not even pagans do that?
Reactions are so visceral there leaves little room for discussion. Facebook tirades turn into statements with "no comments please." No discussion please, they say.
No discussion?
It's offensive to me that a lack of discussion is permissible. It's offensive to me that unbridled hate and statements made without question are given free reign.
But I understand why they are. People are tired of "discussions" gone sour. On Facebook, discussions rarely exist. Now with hate being an okay, socially acceptable disease, they devolve quickly into puff matches. And I don't care who you're voting for, the candidates are all stewing it at this point. It gives them fuel, and it gives them donors.
Dude, I could go on and on and spiral downward with this country.
Hate is bait.
Instead, I'm going to pull myself out of the muck. I'm going to try to take the hate and turn what I see as something destroying political debate - and therefore our country - into something constructive. I'm going to revitalize something called, "asking questions."
I've developed a constructive outline for disagreements on Facebook. I hope this proves useful to you. I hope your friendships are maintained or even enhanced by the outline below. Thomas Jefferson and John Adams frequently disagreed and yet were able to pull some semblance of a lasting document together. We can do it, dudes! We can rise above this chaos.
Here we go:
Step 1: Facebook statement made, or graphic posted
Step 2: Friend/commenter of that person reminds themselves that that person, who has been their FRIEND, truly believes in what they posted.
Step 3: Commenter: instead of disagreeing right off the bat, ask, "What are your reasons for this opinion? I respect you, and I'd like to know where you are coming from."
Step 4: Statement Originator: State reasons without turning a stink eye at your Facebook friend. Keep it, as we used to say in the 90s, professional. Professional means a focus on the issue and facts, not any assumptions you have about your friend, the media, or the world.
Step 5: Commenter: "Interesting."
And then nothing else! I dare you! Just THINK about their reasons! Step away from Facebook. Go about your more important day. This is especially important should your passionate disagreement rise within you like a Montezuma's Revenge symptom, rocket-powered, unstoppable, on its way out... JUST STOP.
And after a few hours, when you have your wits about you, you can return.
Step 6: Commenter: "I've been thinking about what you wrote/posted/drew. I understand your reasons. I respectfully disagree for these reasons."
And then avoid words used commonly now in major news stories to persuade or convey emotion. They are typically adverbs. Yes, so just casually avoid adverbs. Everyone knows you are just as passionate as the next person. Present yourself professionally so that your friend can even hear your ideas.
It's a good thing, this seeking understanding from one another. We can rise above the new healthcare dependency age of 26. Let's be 21 again when we take responsibility for ourselves, shall we? Let's strive to conduct ourselves like adults and not fall for the bait of hate.
Let's use this political climate to reach across aisles. One can disagree with policies, how people represent themselves (certainly!), but it's dangerous to use that as a reason to hate any person - a candidate, or a friend. In fundamentalist worlds, that hate can be manipulated to do anything. Do not give it a berth in your heart. Do not let that start at a friendship's expense.
Don't empty your pockets or your energy into something that is bad for your soul. At least on Facebook political comments, swim in the stream away from the hate bait - flee it before it sucks you in to the bucket of other fish who bit. It's not okay to hate - anyone.
Matthew 5:43“You have heard that it was said, ‘Love your neighbori and hate your enemy.’ 44But I tell you, love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you, 45that you may be children of your Father in heaven. He causes his sun to rise on the evil and the good, and sends rain on the righteous and the unrighteous. 46If you love those who love you, what reward will you get? Are not even the tax collectors doing that? 47And if you greet only your own people, what are you doing more than others? Do not even pagans do that?
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